Posts Categorized: Complaining

No kick from champagne

Dear Housewives, Regrettably, I, Portman Doe, purveyoress of queer housewife wisdom, have not been doing well. Things started out fine. I began my day by donating my time to a charitable cause. My friends have a new yacht and needed company on the water. I obliged despite the havoc on my tresses. A lesson for you, housewives:… Read more »

A pig and a poke

Dear Housewives, I’ve had the most distressing day. I attempted to buy packaged meat at the grocery store. I know what you’re thinking, housewives, “Why did she do it?” I, too, am perplexed and have surely learned my lesson. There are two butcher shops in our neighbourhood. I usually don’t go to the closer one. It’s the… Read more »

Astronautical Delights

Dear Housewives, Kit and I are hooked on the TV series Extant. Privatization of space exploration. Aliens or viruses or something. Androids. Its star-filled cast includes Halle Berry, Hiroyuki Sanada, Goran Visnijc, Camryn Manheim and Pierce Gagnon, the little boy who blew my mind in Looper. But Extant is ridiculous, and here’s why: (SPOILERS, housewives. Spoilers. But not for the most recent episodes.) Let’s start… Read more »

Reminiscing on Il Postino

Dear Housewives, I do love a good Italian film, especially if it gives me the opportunity to be pretentious. I recall a Friday evening some time ago when our TV Guide channel announced that Il Postino was scheduled as the midnight movie on a local Vancouver television station. How exciting! It was back before the… Read more »

Pinterfeiting

Dear Housewives, We’ve all been there, online in the wee hours, compulsively pinning images to our Pinterest boards. Repinning others’ treasured finds. Perusing West Elm and Crate and Barrel for the perfect terrarium and pinning one’s furniture hopes and decor dreams to the appropriate board. For a while now I’ve been carefully cultivating a certain… Read more »